this is a fun one. a summary of this argument, for those of you who don’t have the time to read all 3,400 words (which are one-part argument but also one-part history of how this framing of cancer came to be and stuck):
[…]hawkish words – talk of ‘battling’, as opposed to, say, ‘coping with’ cancer – have fallen out of favour among physicians, psychologists and patient advocates. As a practising oncologist I avoided that sort of language. War metaphors seemed inapt for describing research or cancer care. And I recognised this risk: if a treatment doesn’t work, if a tumour progresses, patients who have been led to believe that they’re supposed to put up a fight against cancer may blame themselves, mistakenly thinking that they lacked sufficient strength or will, when it’s the treatment that failed.
Many doctors have objected to the use of military words in the context of illness due to the potential psychological ramifications. A person’s lack of responsiveness to cancer treatment, a relapse or death could erroneously suggest that they didn’t try hard enough, that they were ‘weak’ and somehow responsible for succumbing to their illness. A patient’s loved ones may blame them, consciously or not, if they fare poorly after a cancer diagnosis. Patients may even blame themselves.
Yep, exactly how I feel.
I don’t agree with use of ‘coping’ or ‘struggling’ at all. They usually evoke a sense of pity from what I have seen, and that can be crushing for the patients themselves. The word ‘Fighting’ is a double edged sword, but it has it’s benefits, and evokes a sense of solidarity from supporters that ‘coping’ does not.
‘Dealing with’ sounds nice, yeah. Someone I knew online used ‘muddling through’, but ‘dealing’ sounds better
“Dealing with” is pretty much exactly what cope means. Per Merriam Webster:
“to deal with and attempt to overcome problems and difficulties —often used with with”
Personally I do think it works well for this situation. Though I’ve been very fortunate to not have been diagnosed with cancer yet, so I consider my input…less relevant.
Eh, dictionary definition is not always indicative or sometime outdated about the way the word is used irl - in this particular case, I feel ‘cope’ has a more helpless feel to it, while ‘deal’ seems to give more agency to the person in question.
Granted it’s all subjective and dependant on how those words are used in one’s circles, though.
I’m fortunate for the same reason as you and have the same opinion