My god, this is just hilarious. Remember, kids: If a piece of furniture that has been basically agreed upon for thousands of years (with some changes) needs a cloud connection:
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You’re paying too much.
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You’ll continue paying too much.
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You might wake up sweating in an uncomfortable position.
This week’s Amazon Web Services outage had some people waking up on the wrong side of the bed.
A Domain Name System (DNS) resolution problem affected AWS cloud hosting, resulting in an outage that impacted more than 1,000 web-based products and services and millions of people.
Perhaps one of the most avoidable breakdowns came via people’s beds. The reliance on the Internet for smart bed products from Eight Sleep resulted in people being awoken by beds locked into inclined positions and sweltering temperatures.
As spotted by Dexerto, the AWS outage caused smart mattress covers from Eight Sleep to malfunction. These “Pod” mattress covers connect to a physical hub, and users can set the covers to temperatures between 55° and 110° Fahrenheit via a companion app. Eight Sleep also sells smart mattress bases that let people control their bed’s elevation with the app. As of this writing, the Pods’ MSRPs range from $2,449 to $3,249, and the base has a $1,950 MSRP. Eight Sleep also sells its Autopilot feature through an annual subscription that starts at $199. Autopilot is supposed to help automatically set Eight Sleep devices to users’ optimal sleeping conditions. Pod purchases require a one-year subscription to Autopilot.
There’s admittedly a bit of Schadenfreude here. You seriously subscribed to a fucking bed?



Yeah, I absolutely adore being able to set up things that make my life easier without getting in the way and without worrying it’ll all ruin my day if something stops working.
We use smart light switches that look and work like regular switches, but with Z-wave control built in. Controlling otherwise non-smart lights is great, but then so is being able to trigger things with double and triple presses!
My favorite example is that my espresso machine takes a moment to warm up in the morning, so I have it on a Z-wave outlet for remote control. I can turn it on from my bedroom by double-clicking my bedroom light switch on the way out of the room in the morning. By the time I collect the cups from the office, and get them cleaned out in the kitchen, the machine is usually ready to use.
I’m rather close to a downward triple-press in the bedroom kicking off a full bedtime routine that turns off all the lights, TVs, locks the house doors (with feedback from a smart speaker if that fails), locks the car doors, turns the temperature down a couple of degrees, and arms the house alarm.
A downward triple-press in my office locks the family’s computers.
All 100% locally, and I adore it!