One random night, I lay on my bed in my silent bedroom, and I felt that the silence is uncomfortable. Why, I asked myself, that the silence felt sharp, like I prefer the noise of my annoyingly loud dehumidifier, or the muffled sound of traffic in my old apartment?
I realized that the silence was ringing, in a high pitched noise that we all associate with being hit near the ears. My inner voice told myself: “man, you have tinnitus.”
Thinking back, that wasn’t the first time I thought that I have tinnitus, but I was probably in denial for years, or it just got louder. The sad part is that I’m only 26, and somehow, I feared getting tinnitus ever since my childhood.
Even worse, I just ordered a pair of headphones with ANC, and when I don’t play anything through it, the ringing gets very clear.
Was depressed for a few days, thinking that it’s not fair that I got it even though I don’t expose myself to loud noises often, I listen to music at a couple levels lower than my preference, and I don’t turn up my music to drown out noises.
But nothing in life is fair, and to compared to the suffering of others, this is only a mild discomfort. So I’ll try to keep positive about it, and be grateful that I still enjoy a comparatively luxurious life.
I’ll visit a doctor soon though!
Any of you have a similar experience? I’ll be happy to read your stories!
Yeah I think I’ve had it my entire life, tbh. I think it likely significantly contributed to my fear of the dark as a child (and even sometimes now as an adult).
I don’t hear a single tone. It’s a kind of subtle noise that seems to have a lack of tone. It reminds me of a CRT whine, but a bit different. Most notably, it constantly warbles in quality and directionality, which is why I think it contributes to said fear. It can make it hear or really simply “feel” like an entity is there when it isn’t.
In general I don’t really pay too much attention it. Only when there’s a lack of noise or stimulation…as when you’re trying to sleep.
When people described silence as being “deafening” metaphorically, I always assumed they meant literally because they were talking about the noise lol.