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schizoidman@lemm.ee to World News@lemmy.worldEnglish · 1 个月前

White smoke appears from Sistine Chapel chimney, indicating a new pope has been elected

www.straitstimes.com

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White smoke appears from Sistine Chapel chimney, indicating a new pope has been elected

www.straitstimes.com

schizoidman@lemm.ee to World News@lemmy.worldEnglish · 1 个月前
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US Cardinal Prevost elected Pope Leo XIV, first American pontiff
www.straitstimes.com
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“Peace be with you all,” the new pontiff said, in his first public words. Read more at straitstimes.com. Read more at straitstimes.com.
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  • pticrix@lemmy.ca
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    I don’t care for Christianity, but god I’d love it to see a black pope emerge, just to see the White Power writhes and scream.

    • dual_sport_dork 🐧🗡️@lemmy.world
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      Those white power redneck types are all protestants (baptists, or some other evangelical wingnut strain) and most of them have a vehement anti-Catholic streak. A black pope would just confirm to them whatever-the-hell conspiracy shit they already believe about the Catholic church, so it’d more or less just be spitting on a forest fire anyways.

      Not that the Vatican shouldn’t do it anyway, though.

      • jedibob5@lemmy.world
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        I’d say most of them are protestants, but there’s been a trend of a certain type of far-right “RETVRN TO TRADITION” wingnuts converting and becoming hardline tradcaths in the last decade or so. Those people absolutely would seethe over a black pope.

    • Jo Miran@lemmy.ml
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      I loved the twist ending in Conclave.

      Please, do not reply with spoilers.

      EDIT: I did this to myself.

      • Fisch@discuss.tchncs.de
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        • Jo Miran@lemmy.ml
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      • OhStopYellingAtMe@lemmy.world
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      • PlzGivHugs@sh.itjust.works
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        1 个月前

      • This is fine🔥🐶☕🔥@lemmy.world
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        1 个月前

        Snape kills Dumbledore

        • Jerkface (any/all)@lemmy.ca
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          1 个月前

          romans kill jesus

          • This is fine🔥🐶☕🔥@lemmy.world
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            30 天前

            Even bigger spoiler: he gets better.

      • themeatbridge@lemmy.world
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        1 个月前

        If someone drops into St. Peter’s Square with a parachute, I win $3,000.

    • Q*Bert Reynolds@sh.itjust.works
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      Nazis and KKK members already hate Catholics.

    • Omega@discuss.online
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      30 天前

      I was really hoping for turkson

    • fluxion@lemmy.world
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      1 个月前

      Pope Trump would be more likely

  • boydster@sh.itjust.works
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    I just learned that there is a Cardinal Pizzaballa from Italy that is on the short list of expected potential popes. On name alone, I hope he wins. I know he won’t be called Pope Pizzaballa, but in my heart that is what he’d be known as, spoken in the most Super Mario type accent imaginable

    Edit: Sorry, not sorry, I couldn’t help myself, you who are now perusing this thread have to see it as well

    • grte@lemmy.ca
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      As far as I’m aware there is no rule he can’t pick his own name as his pope name, should he want to be cool.

      • P00ptart@lemmy.world
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        They love their ancient traditions, some of which significantly predate Christianity.

    • swab148@lemm.ee
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      Pope Pizzaballs

      • CmdrShepard42@lemm.ee
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        Pizza the Pope

        • Rozz@lemmy.sdf.org
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          Should have photoshopped on the hat

          • CmdrShepard42@lemm.ee
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            I really wanted to but I’m on mobile.

            • Rozz@lemmy.sdf.org
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              Same

              Edit: I became the change I wanted to see in the world

              I became the change I wanted to see in the world

              • CmdrShepard42@lemm.ee
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                30 天前

                I hope your effort takes off and I see this image on the news one day.

        • swab148@lemm.ee
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          This is my favorite comment on this thread

      • HowAbt2morrow@futurology.today
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        But you do have to pronounce it in Italian so it’ll probably be Papa Pizzaballahs.

      • M137@lemmy.world
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        Poopoopeepeepizzaballs

    • AbouBenAdhem@lemmy.world
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      In Italian or Latin, it would be “Papa Pizzaballa”.

    • fluxion@lemmy.world
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      Is that an official campaign poster?

    • Hubi@feddit.org
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      I legitimately thought they were joking when they mentioned the name on TV just now.

    • Deconceptualist@lemm.ee
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      Time to deliver a pizza ball! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxOkeLQohC0

    • saltnotsugar@lemm.ee
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      I know its pronounced Pizzaballa, but in my head it’s Pizza (techno air horns) BAWWWWWLAH!

  • SarcasticMan@lemmy.world
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    This is going to be a tough conversation when they call. The farm takes up most of my day and at night I like a cup of tea, I might not be able to devote myself full time to being Pope.

    Edit: that was easier than I thought it would be. They called and I told them straight up I didn’t have time to be pope. They said they figured I would turn them down so they had a guy from Chicago as a back up.

    • floofloof@lemmy.ca
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      I hope to be co-Pope to help the Pope cope.

      • HowAbt2morrow@futurology.today
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        If they pick a dope, you’ll need to help the dope pope cope as a co-pope.

        • dual_sport_dork 🐧🗡️@lemmy.world
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          We can only hope.

          • OhStopYellingAtMe@lemmy.world
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            I’d offer help to cope but I’m at the end of my rope.

            • floofloof@lemmy.ca
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              So is the end of your rope a nope to the co-co-dope cope pope hope?

              • pticrix@lemmy.ca
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                Myope co-pope use scope and spot new pope mope, cope with dope, and elope.

          • HowAbt2morrow@futurology.today
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            And if he practiced boxing at some point, he should know how to “rope a dope”.

    • prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      I can confirm this is true. Word is they’re pretty disappointed.

  • ExtremeDullard@lemmy.sdf.org
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    Yeah! The world’s largest cult has a new guru!

    • Jo Miran@lemmy.ml
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      The world’s largest religious denomination is Sunni Islam with 22.39% of the world’s population (as of 2020). Catholic Christianity comes in a distant second with 15.88%.

      https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religious_denomination

      • Zetta@mander.xyz
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        Too many cults to keep track of, they are all brainrot

      • OhStopYellingAtMe@lemmy.world
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        Sunni day, pushin’ the clouds away…. o/~

      • DMCMNFIBFFF@lemmy.world
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        Who’s their leader?

  • Kami@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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  • Tomtits@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    1 个月前

    What tariffs will Trump declare when he finds out it’s not him??

    • finder@lemmy.world
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      Trump taxing the Church? That’s a funny thought.

    • AbouBenAdhem@lemmy.world
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      1 个月前

      100% tariff on indulgences.

    • OhStopYellingAtMe@lemmy.world
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      1 个月前

      “I declare a 100% tariff on all absolutions coming from the Vatican…”

    • IrateAnteater@sh.itjust.works
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      Doesn’t even need tariffs. Could just take away their tax exemption.

  • Lemmyoutofhere@lemmy.ca
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    A new head pedofile has been chosen.

  • 👍Maximum Derek👍@discuss.tchncs.de
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    Is this like Publisher’s Clearing House? Will people show up at my door with balloons and big novelty hat to tell me I won?

    • Jo Miran@lemmy.ml
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      I believe that’s more of a Dalai Lama thing.

  • 21Cabbage@lemmynsfw.com
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    That seems relatively fast but I honestly can’t be assed to research Catholic bureaucratic history.

  • Jerkface (any/all)@lemmy.ca
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    alternate theory: The Pope Smokes Dope

  • This is fine🔥🐶☕🔥@lemmy.world
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    They’re marketing the movie a year late. Smh.

  • ShittyBeatlesFCPres@lemmy.world
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    https://youtu.be/cAvXnBgJMdM

  • BroBot9000@lemmy.world
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    No no. Just means they require a new set of alter boys.

    Edit: they picked the guy that didn’t do anything about abuse claims. Classic

  • HowAbt2morrow@futurology.today
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    You know they used ChatGPT to pick this new dude.

    • Unleaded8163@fedia.io
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      Haven’t you heard? The cardinals are raw dogging it in there. https://nypost.com/2025/05/07/world-news/cbs-anchor-bizarrely-says-cardinals-are-raw-dogging-the-conclave-on-live-tv/

      • InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world
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        Most credible NY Post reporting.

    • HowAbt2morrow@futurology.today
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      Downvotes for that? Must have been some triggered pre-finger-blasted altered boys.

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